On the (Political) Sidelines with Dan Sousa: Life as a "Swinger"

Loudoun County, Va (Nov. 5, 2012) - So is it just me ... or is there some kind of big election coming up ... psych!

Ah, life in a Swing State (hello, Virginia!) is one thing but when the Democrats and Republicans ID your county (hello, Loudoun!) as a crucial battleground then you truly have been in the eye of the Presidential Election hurricane.

Robo calls. Yard signs. Robo calls. Bumper stickers. Door knockers (please, no Young Frankenstein jokes). Robo Calls. Did I mention Robo calls ...

Working from home (here at the Viva Loudoun World Headquarters in Ashburn) goes something like this on a daily basis:


You Have 13 new messages ...

**Beep: Hello this is Clint Eastwood ... **
**Beep: Please hold to be buzzed into Tim Kaine's press conference ...**
**Beep: Hi, Eileen, this is your neighbor from the Cascades and ...**
**Beep: This is the NRA calling ...**
**Beep: Barack Obama calling to remind you to vote Tuesday ...**
**Beep: We would like to invite you to a victory rally in Sterling ...**
**Beep: Hi, Bob, this your neighbor from Broadlands calling ...**
**Beep: I want to talk to you about a women's right to ...**
**Beep: Michelle Obama will be in Leesburg on ...**
**Beep: Ann Romney will be in Leesburg ...**
**Beep: Do you know George Allen's record on ...**
**Beep: I'm Mitt Romney and I approve this ...**
**Beep: Hi, Barry, this your neighbor from Hamilton ...**

End of messages ... answering machine full ... press delete to delete all messages ...

Come on ... Eileen! I think the phone banks are working 24-7 and misfiring right and left (get it, right ... and left) just to get in all their calls. I've been called a lot of things but Eileen!

I've been avoiding Facebook as some of my "friends" want to pick political fights with other "friends" ... can't we just all be "friends."

Don't get me wrong, I love the political process and I love elections. Heck, I was a political science major in college (qualifies you to work at Starbucks I think or run your own website) and I even dabbled in political news writing. Highlight of my college internship at the Stockton Record in California was getting a drink thrown in my face by a young women who didn't like my journalism.

If that was a low point of my internship (If I had known the drink was coming I would have opened my mouth to get a little enjoyment!) then 30 minutes later was a high point when the candidate supported by the drink tosser saw me walking back to the newspaper building downtown and offered me a ride and then offered an apology for the actions of his supporters. Score one for humanity!

I'm probably one of the political problems in Virginia and Loudoun because over the years I have voted for candidates on both sides of the spectrum and I can be swayed by the man (or woman!) not the party. So both parties have been trying to reach me and other swing voters ... over and over and over.

(It is not true that you can ID the swing voters in Ashburn by the white rocks in their front yards ... and this is a joke that about six people will get but well worth it!) ...

They say all politics is local and just look at this schedule for today in Loudoun:

6 a.m. President Obama serving flapjacks at the volunteer fire department breakfast in Sterling
7:15 a.m. Mitt Romney knocking on (and cleaning!) car windows at the park and ride in Leesburg
9:30 a.m. Ann Romney speaks in Leesburg
9:30 a.m. Michelle Obama speaks in Leesburg
9:45 a.m. Ann Romney and Michelle Obama in MMA cage fight in Leesburg (wait, this might not have happened ...)
11 a.m. Paul Ryan doing taxes for free at H&R Block in Purcellville
Noon Joe Biden teaching ESL in South Riding ("Malarkey" .... Ma-lar-key)

OK ... I may have made up some (or all) of that but we have had more visits by both candidates and their wives (and the Romney boys! Tagg! Tigg! Tugg! Trig!) and their surrogates than probably anywhere in America. I saw Clint Eastwood getting escorted out of Pier One Imports in Leesburg on Saturday for screaming at the furniture ...

Tomorrow is election day and it won't surprise me if I come downstairs and Mitt Romney is fixing an omelette for the family and Barack Obama is sorting our recycling ...wait, is that Paul Ryan in my office doing my financials (sweet! Oh, I'm losing money ... Not Sweet!) ... and Joe Biden is warming up the car to take the boys to school!

And all I have to do to end this dream ... is to vote ...

And all of you should vote too ... It doesn't matter if you vote left, right, far left, far right, etc. but please exercise your right to vote and come Wednesday morning, no matter if your candidate wins or loses, our great country will move along ... and keep being great!

And, yes, the robo calls will stop ... it will be so, so quiet ... until the next election cycle starts ... and I'll be moving to Montana by then ...

Dan Sousa is the editor of Viva Loudoun and doesn't say if he is a Democrat or Republican but does say that life has never been the same since his high school government class (Mr. Harry Love! And he is NOT making up that name!) campaign for John Anderson in 1980 was crushed by both Ronald Reagan AND Jimmy Carter!